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Anonymous

"The Best American Humorous Short Stories"

Kamp, jis' you save yore time. I give a man
four dollars fer one o' them check things oncet, an' I owe myself them
four dollars yit."
Mr. Van Kamp retired in disorder, but the thought of his wife and
daughter waiting confidently on the porch stopped him. Moreover, the
thing had resolved itself rather into a contest between Ellsworth and
himself, and he had done a little making and breaking of men and
things in his own time. He did some gatling-gun thinking out by the
newel-post, and presently rejoined Uncle Billy.
"Mr. Tutt, tell me just exactly what Mr. Ellsworth rented, please," he
requested.
"Th' hull house," replied Billy, and then he somewhat sternly added:
"Paid me spot cash fer it, too."
Mr. Van Kamp took a wad of loose bills from his trousers pocket,
straightened them out leisurely, and placed them in his bill book,
along with some smooth yellowbacks of eye-bulging denominations. Uncle
Billy sat up and stopped twiddling his thumbs.
"Nothing was said about the furniture, was there?" suavely inquired
Van Kamp.
Uncle Billy leaned blankly back in his chair. Little by little the
light dawned on the ex-horse-trader.


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